Over the summer I spent some time pretending to be cooler than I am at tda advertising & design. At the time, we were throwing around concepts for Celestial Seasonings. By the end of the summer none of the concepts were pushed through to production, and I had to come back to Virginia. But eventually Brad and Will got this beauty through:
I loved the idea mostly because I work at coffee shop and get to hear the ridiculous orders that are made just so the person can secretly say this with their order, “Hey barista, I understand coffee so much that I’m going to make your life a living hell by making you spend 10 minutes on my stupid order that I’ll end up spilling on the way back to my car, but it’s okay because I’m actually on a diet right now but I still had to buy this to make you think I’m cultured”.
But I loved it even more when I was at the coffee shop one day and I saw a man reading the New York Times. On the back of the paper was this ad:
It like a west coast coffee vs tea gang fight, and I was on the outskirts in one of those gangs.
Actually, I hate the mis-usage of the ellipsis. It does not mean to take a brief break from writing to eat a bagel and come back and finish the sentence. If the last sentence read: “It does not mean to take a brief break from writing to eat a bagel… and come back and finish the sentence”, it would mean something happened somewhere between the half eaten bagel and finishing your sentence that you aren’t willing to tell me about. And personally, either tell me what happened or don’t. Please don’t taunt me with the a great literary bagel mystery.
Please do not use the ellipsis to build suspense. They do not build suspense. They construct unending mysteries that not even Sherlock Holmes can solve because technically they are not mysteries at all, but instead just the misuse of a grammatical symbol.
Why is it that carrot cake always have frosted carrots on top of the cake? Strawberry cakes don’t have giant frosted strawberries on the top. It’s almost like a warning: Watch out under this cake is a vegetable attempting to be a fruit!