I'm Leaving The Child In Me At Home
photo credit: a yard sale posting on facebook
Tor And The Mystery Of The Holland Shirt...
Whenever I wear my Holland shirt people always as me if I’m from Holland. I never get questioned about my origins when I’m wearing any of my other shirts.
Fire Ants on a Log
Just like ants on a log but with cranberries instead of raisins. Delicious.
My Dream Home: The 2nd And Final Chapter
I went to visit it today. It was destroyed. Someone destroyed my dreams. I will destroy them.
Attn: Creative Directors Please Hire Jillian...
me: “i got an email from this lady saying that i wouldn’t be the right fit for the apartment because i have a rabbit.” jillian: “maybe she’s a carrot.”
Of The Big Apple.
I understand everyone and no one all at the same time.
Please Don't Lie To Me
me: “the sausage, egg and cheese croissant?” lady: “oh i ordered a sausage and cheese croissant. no egg. – i could take it off.” me: “no, no I’ll fix the order for you.” lady: “well – i am allergic.” ingredients in our croissants: sugar, yeast, flour, milk, salt, sugar, eggs, and butter
I found it!!! I’ve always envisioned my dream home to be window-less and door-less. Dreams really do come true. They really do.
I don’t frequent my blog.